Five Moms

On this eve of the day we celebrate mothers I cannot help but to think about 5 mothers that I know and love. The five begins with my own mom; the balance is the daughters she gave birth to, each one having gone from being mom’s daughter to becoming mothers of their own.

Mom also had two sons, me and the other one. Sorry Mike today is about the women who influenced our early years.

It would be quite simple to list the platitudes that describe Mom and my sisters. Being a Mom brings with it many adjectives, most now cliches. I looked at dozens of Mother’s Day cards today to find the one that is just right for Mom. The cards are all filled with phrases and words like, “the best”, “most loving”, “caring”, “sweet” and “amazing”.  There is no doubt that these 5 moms would meet the criteria of these motherly words. But there is so much more than that.

I would be remiss if I didn’t introduce them to you; there is Mom, Sandy, Cindy, Janet and Sue. A house full of children may or may not have been in the plans but that's  what Mom got. What she did with it is what is so amazing.

Dad was a non-commissioned officer in the Air Force. Another way of saying that would be— we had very little money! But Mom always managed to make sure we had what we needed, and on special occasion she would somehow manage to provide what we wanted.  Mom shared her love for God with us in an unobtrusive manner; we knew she loved Him even if we didn’t understand why. The results, each Wednesday evening she hosts our family bible study in her home, where her children, grandchildren and even great grandchildren gather for a time of fellowship. For more than 55 years she has served her role as “Mom” and still sees her children each week, still concerned that we have what we need  or want. More importantly she taught us to recognize the difference. What an incredible woman. What an incredible Mom.

Sandy is her eldest daughter. The character of Mom can be seen in Sandy’s life every day. She raised three children of her own facing the same type of adversities that Mom faced. Even in hard times she manages a smile. If any small child reaches up towards her they will surely be picked up and held close to her heart, a mother's heart. Today she cares for her grandchildren, influencing their lives by sharing the love she has for Christ with them. Incredible Mom #2.

Cindy was the first daughter to become a mother. In all she would give birth to and raise three children. She did this while at the same time being the constant in the Hirtle family. In a family as large as mine it seems that there is always someone facing a problem, Cindy is the one we turn to. In a storm she knows how to right the ship. She cares about our needs before her own. And she did all this, being a taxi, a mediator or just a friend, while raising her children, never missing a step. Incredible Mom #3.

Janet is mini-Mom. I don’t know if she realizes how much like our Mom she really is. Her motherly love extends well beyond her own two sons. She has opened her home to more grandchildren than I think she actually has. It seemed for a long time that each time I visited her home there would be a new face that needed washing or a peck on the cheek. I often wondered if she had secret rooms somewhere, how anyone could make room for so many people. But if you watch her from across the room as she stands over a hot stove making supper for an army, you will see on her face a love that can only come from Christ. Incredible Mom #4.

Sue was Mom’s baby girl. She went home to be with our Lord five years ago. If there was only one adjective used to describe moms it would be servant. My baby sister Sue was the epitome of servant. Not only to guests in her home but to her own two children. I don’t know if you realize how difficult a task this is to accomplish, not being a servant to your children but having a servant’s heart. She faced adversities that others haven’t and always managed somehow to smile. It is her smile that her children inherited. Incredible Mom #4.

Describing these five women’s motherly achievement could go on and on. I probably haven’t told them enough how great I think they are.

The common thread they share is what makes them truly incredible Moms. All the other things are beautiful and important, but without this last ingredient they would be just Moms.

The common thread, the last ingredient—they were there.

From the moment her child entered this scary world, sucking in its first breath in order to release its first cry, she was there. When they fell down and scraped a knee, she was there. When the storms woke them up to scary bedroom shadows, she was there. When they fell in love for the first time, she was there. When their hearts broke, she was there. When they talked back, when they slammed doors, she was there. When they waved good-bye on their way to being all grown up, she was there.

These 5 Moms have always been there.

Happy Mother’s Day.

1.7%

How did it happen? When did time away from God become more abundant then time with God? There are 168 hours in the week and most of us will spend less than 3 hours a week with God. I know that there are some of you that spend more than that with Him. Just as I know there are some of you who spend less than that over an entire year. Certainly God is deserves more than 1.7% of our time. After all, He gave it to us.

I began by asking the question-“Is God missing in action?”  Quite honestly if He was we wouldn’t realize it because of the miserable amount of time we spend with Him.

I am going to step out of my own self-imposed boundaries for just a moment by confessing to you something from my private life. 

My ex-wife was gone for three days before I even realized that she had left me.

We had quit spending time with each other years before. After twenty years of marriage we could rarely find anything to share, including time. Other things became more urgent or more appealing. There remained an unassailable security  knowing that at the end of each day she would be there. We would have about 1.7% of our allotted daily time to spend together. That’s 18 minutes for those of you who didn’t pay attention in math class. If you are wondering  was it “quality time”, well I think you already know the answer.

We were experiencing an economy of accord. I was still in love with her, and believe she may have still had love for me.  Love is a powerful force but one that must be in motion to experience all that it has to offer. Hosea’s love for Gomer is evident from the very beginning of the book. Their marriage was strained by Gomer’s adultery. Time was spent apart as she played her games. An incredible illustration of Hosea putting his love for her into motion is recorded in the third chapter. Gomer had apparently displeased her lovers; as a result she was placed on the auction block. The writer tells us in  Hosea 3:2-

“So I bought her for fifteen shekels of silver and about a homer and three bushels of barley. Then I told her, “You are to live with me many days, you must not be a prostitute or be intimate with any man, and I will live with you.”

What incredible love. He loved her enough to forgive, loved enough to sacrifice. And then he concludes his colloquy by committing time!     “…and I will live with you.”

What happens when we quit spending time with God? When we stop sharing our joys and our burdens with Him? When we stop talking (praying)? Our busy lives become our priority. Work or play steals time from our relationship with the Creator. Oh we still love Him, and there is security in knowing Him. Sunday morning rolls around and we happily march off to church to spend our 1.7% of time singing His praise.

As time passes it becomes easier to allot our time elsewhere. We become complacent with a mediocre relationship. An that is okay,  or so we think.Our salvation is secure because of His promise. Our hope resurfaces when adversity crosses our threshold. We love Him. And we believe He loves us.

 The motion is missing. What does God see when He looks into our stagnant hearts?

God wants your love; He also wants your time.

This economy of accord is on many levels. Relationships with God are missing in or families, in our churches and communities. A nation whose principals were founded in a belief and relationship with God no longer has time for Him. Globally this story repeats over and over. The very world  He created no longer has time for the Creator.

1.7% is not enough.

I pray that we don’t wake up one day to realize He has already gone.

The Face of God

The emotion we experience when we fall in love is comparably different than the love we have for God. Falling in love eventually requires tangible reciprocation. Hearts flutter in harmony. The light touch of nothing more than fingertips is enough to generate wonder of what the future together may bring. We anticipate seeing their face, looking into their eyes, touching her lips. Every song we hear reminds us of the one we are falling in love with.  Eventually “our song” ascends above all the rest.  (To this day Roberta Flack’s “The first time ever I saw your face” still brings up fond memories of Robin and makes my heart flutter)  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Go9aks4aujM

For most the highly charged emotions of new love begins to wane. The time that passes before the excitement diminishes varies from couple to couple. Some have told me that the feeling has never diminished; they somehow manage to fall in love each new day. I think they lied to me.

Now it is not the love for each other that has diminished, it is the excitement, the glow. Our lives before falling in love begin to resurface. Old friends demand some of our time. Earlier delicately concealed blemishes begin to appear. Gone is the excitement of catching just a glimpse of her face as you pass through the day. Holding hands is just holding hands.  Ah, but the song, the song rekindles feelings each time you hear  the melody, each time you lip the words. Music has a profound effect on our psyche. Music’s ability to generate memories, to rekindle new love, to make us want to sing along or to make us cry is matched by none.

Months, years, march along. The love grows and strengthens, but never does it return to the excitement of those first days. And then sometimes it falters. But I will stop there, more on that later.

Though the love we have for God is different, there are similarities along the way. Many years ago when I first accepted Christ into my life, when I first loved Him, I would wake each morning with His name on my lips. I read His word at every opportunity. I spoke to Him through prayer almost without ceasing. I listened to Christian music for the first time in my life and enjoyed it. This new relationship brought excitement. I looked forward to see what each new day would bring.

Somewhere along the way, I cannot remember when, the excitement lessened. My life before God began to slowly resurface. Obligations demanded my time. I still prayed but it was more structured than the impromptu conversations I had previously enjoyed. I rediscovered that I appreciate all types of music, and Christian music wasn’t really in the top three.

But my love for God did not lessen, in fact it continues to grow. The pace probably isn’t always pleasing to God.  But the newness, the frenzy of my early walk with Christ had faded considerably. 

I confessed to you earlier that the relationships I have experienced over the decades have more than faded, they have died. I am quite certain that my love for God will never meet that certain fate.

My questions for you tonight-are the emotions of the beginning certain to flee? Are they necessary to sustain our relationships? 

 Do you remember the first time you saw His face?

You and Me (part III)

Falling in love is great. Being in love is incredible. Staying in love, well I haven’t quite figured that one out yet so any adjective placed here would flounder.

God’s love is everlasting. I am amazed each time I read the stories from the bible, especially those found in the Old Testament, where we see the people that God loved so much turn their backs on Him, yet His love for them never faltered.  And then we read of the inconceivable abuse that Jesus the Christ, the Son of God, suffered through; the beatings, being spat upon, then more beatings. Nevertheless because He loved so much He hung nailed to a cross until He died, for you and for me.

Can we even begin to understand the love of God? How can this indescribable love last and last? Well you may say,

“Jim, He is God.”, and you would be right.

 And I would reply, “Fill in your name, that is too easy.” Particularly when you consider the ones He bestows this love upon, you and me.

We use many “omni-“words to describe God, omnipotent, infinite in power, omnipresence, being everywhere and omniscience, knowing everything and everyone, including you and me. When you combine all this omni you have a God that knows what you were going to do before you did it. And yet He still loves you! Incredible! Certainly if I change the pronoun from you to me.

You see I know the darkest parts of myself, so does God. They are vile and ugly, tucked away in the darkest recesses of my mind, kept there in check…most of the time. I could not love someone with the same dark, abhorrent substance that hides inside me. And yet God does.

If we studied all the things, the behaviors and the conflict that mankind has portrayed against God for more than 4000 years the list would be exhaustive. In the book of Hosea, God describes the behavior of the Israelites as harlotry. They committed adultery, not only with small “g” gods, but among themselves without abandon. Hosea’s own wife, Gomer, slept in the beds of other men. If our spouse behaved as the Israelites did it would be grounds for divorce. A fracturing of love between man and woman would be certain and expected. Words would be exchanged that cannot be printed here. Emotions would be out of control, tears would flow almost without end. Our children and family members would be exposed to our pain; they would have their own to bear. Friends would divide, his and hers.

 Love would turn to hate.

God didn’t and doesn’t file for divorce. Oh He threw His hands up once before and we ended up with Noah on one damn big boat. If there is a fracturing of our relationship with God it is never Him causing the breach. If there is pain, His is greater than ours. He never hates.  If there are tears…

I don’t want to make God cry.